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TheAphexTwin84
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read my profile
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Name: Dave
Country: United States
State: New York
Birthday: 5/22/1984
Gender: Male
Interests: Playing guitar and drums, trying to play piano. Obsessing over my car (Evolution). Installing car stereos for cheap. That's about it... oh besides digging myself deep into debt.
Expertise: Car/Home Stereo equipment, installation, repair... I guess that's my big thing.
Occupation: Student
Industry: Research
Message: message me
Member Since:
1/21/2003
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| KingJimmy0522: It isn't that I don't love you, Dave.
Zhen Xin Ai: no I understand what it is Jim .. *holds back from crying* strong dave, strong dave
KingJimmy0522: <sigh>
KingJimmy0522: No help, you are.
Zhen Xin Ai: why do you hate me Jim
Zhen Xin Ai: ?
KingJimmy0522: you should stop reading over people's shoulders.
KingJimmy0522: That's a trademark of a terrible, terrible person.
Zhen Xin Ai: no, Jim, not loving Dave and not coming to the party with me is the mark of a terrible person
Zhen Xin Ai: this is me Jim, this is Dave
KingJimmy0522: Oh.
Zhen Xin Ai: it always has been
Zhen Xin Ai: you don't even know me anymore?!
KingJimmy0522: We've become two different people, I'm afraid.
Zhen Xin Ai: what happened to us, we used to be so close.
KingJimmy0522: Yeah...I dunno.
Zhen Xin Ai: after all I shared with you
KingJimmy0522: :'(
KingJimmy0522: I can't handle this.
KingJimmy0522: It's too painful for me.
KingJimmy0522: I have to be alone.
Zhen Xin Ai: JIM, DONT YOU THINK ITS PAINFUL FOR ME TOO?!?!
Zhen Xin Ai: sorry
Zhen Xin Ai: I didn't mean to yell
Zhen Xin Ai: I'm just upset!
Zhen Xin Ai: I see how it is
Zhen Xin Ai: you aren't tired
KingJimmy0522: I am tired.
KingJimmy0522: Too tired to drink and party.
Zhen Xin Ai: not too tired to play cards!!
Zhen Xin Ai: well I'm not drinking]
KingJimmy0522: But I have enough control to be able to play.
KingJimmy0522: Anyway, I must be off.
Zhen Xin Ai: goodbye Jim
Zhen Xin Ai: this is it
Zhen Xin Ai: forever!
KingJimmy0522: :'(
Zhen Xin Ai: *sobs*
KingJimmy0522: <sniff>
The Love of My Life is GONE!!!
I'm so sad. Jim was my everything. And now.... I'm desperately alone.
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| all I have to say right now is  
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| So I'm here (UR) for thanksgiving right now. Its interesting
because I'm not in a dorm setting this year which makes for a much
nicer time. I mean last night I watched TV with some friends and
sat in front of the fire (fireplace) for a few hours. I had
forgotten I actually lived on campus for a bit. I ended the night
with a really cool good talk with Tegan. Even though I miss going
home, which I really do, I miss my brother alot right now, we haven't
had much of a chance to talk recently, I'm having a good time here and
enjoying it to say the least.
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| Hmm I feel like I need to get my life organized right now to salvage
this semester. I've been fucking off alot this semester, more
than I usually do and I'm starting to think there is an underlying
reason for it. (Isn't there always) Part of it is that I
wasn't ready for the demands of heading an organization. I'm
still not and if I had the choice right now (and I knew ICMC would be
fine if I left) I would leave my position. Probably sounds
horrible but I feel like the responsibility of this particular group is
a big boulder weighing on my back right now and something inside feels
like I can't get myself up and going with this semester and my music
and my guitar and my drums without getting rid of it. I started
playing a guitar transcription of Erik Satie's Gymnopedie #1 yesterday,
oh it is incredible and fun. But it really reminded me how much I
just want to drop out of school (well these classes) and just
practice. But I'll stick it out for a degree now, providing I
salvage this semester. If this semester doesn't get any better
though I'm going to be leaving the organization for a spot more
conducive to studying whether I really want to or not.
But enough about that, yay for Rally!
I've actually had the chance more recently to participate in some SCCA
RallyCross events. Oh man is it a blast. I've got my stock
(no really, it is.. I swear!) 91 Talon TSi running in it and it is sooo
much fun. And its a really good experience for driving. But
more importantly I made a great stride in the last event. I was
able to pull down the fastest time of the day racing against fully
prepped open class Rally cars even. It was a great feeling and
I'm hoping to find some way to continue racing without destroying my
car or my bank account completely.
I think that about wraps it up for this week.
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| Well I'm trying to wrap my mind around this and I'm not sure how.
There is a person I know and that person is probably the most deeply
self-centered selfish person I've ever met. And this person is
also insanely devoutly christian, like 4 days a week at church
christian. How can I do it? How can I possibly reconcile
that a devout member of an indoctrination so touted on its morality can
be so blatantly against the grain of normal ethics? I don't think
I can chalk this up to morality being subjective can I?
I guess I'm just at a loss of what to make of it, with all the media
focus on things like value voting and moral high ground ect... ect...
It's so hard to take anyone's "moral code" as honest, as what they say
just goes against how they act so much. Is this the great
compromise of our generation? A culture of dishonest
morality? I like to think not (I want to be a little optimistic)
but sometimes it's hard to think that way.
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